Why Beyonce and Jay-Z Need to Break Up [Click for more]
In “Regret Everything” comedian Will Hines tells us what thoughts have been gnawing at his brain.
Generally, I’m a moral person. But when it comes to my pop music, my brain shifts fully into evil villain mode. No heartbreak is too horrible for the sake of making my Spotify playlists more terrific! These pop stars are no longer human: they are machines. Machines of sadness that totally get what it means to land a solid pop hook.
Given unlimited funds, I would not pursue political power nor lobby to help society. But I would conspire to make Rihanna mad at someone, and then provide ample studio time and a sick rhythm section.
My ultimate plan is perhaps too horrible to even write down. But here it is: Continue reading
"If Jay-Z could somehow be convinced to make the admittedly dumb move of dumping Beyonce, I shudder to think of the power of the music that would be created. A pop opera filled with such deep rage that it would make Black Sabbath look like Ke$ha. An army of songwriters and producers would be summoned to craft a harrowing masterwork of anguish, vengeance and serious fucking beats."